Check out this old-timey looking photograph:
It’s supposed to be a picture representation of unemployment.
But honestly the reason this guy is still unemployed might be because he’s a terrible copywriter!!
Look at his sign again. It’s filled with ME ME ME ME.
It’s all about HIM.
It’s trying to use some sob-story to get someone to hire him. As if someone owes him employment just because he has kids.
If someone’s an employer, they don’t care about this…they care about:
“What can YOU do for ME?”
Well, lemme apply some Photoshop and Kopywriting skills to this picture of Old Unemployed Uncle Joe and see if we can help him out:
AHH!! Much better!!
Remember, next time you’re writing something, don’t sit down like Old Unemployed Uncle Joe here and talk about YOURSELF and YOUR problems and what YOU need.
“But don’t people need to hear about ME a little?”
Yes. There is lots of reasons to talk about yourself. Let’s take a financial advisor as an example.
Look at this guy. His website says:
Now this almost sounds a little scammy, because we don’t know anything about this guy!
But what if the webpage included a few more details including some social proof like this:
Even with scammy sounding copy like this, a few things about the person/company help make you think this might be more legit.
So people do want to hear about you, but mainly because they want to know working with you is good…..FOR THEM.
Next time you’re writing copy, focus on how you can help the other person, and you’ll get a much better response every time.